


Blood Like Ice

by TheOriginalSilvertongue



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Gen, Internalized racism, Jotunn Loki (Marvel), Loki just wants to be a good son, Odin's A+ Parenting, POV Loki (Marvel), Patricide, Self-Hatred
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-05
Updated: 2020-07-05
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:34:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25083208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheOriginalSilvertongue/pseuds/TheOriginalSilvertongue
Summary: More events from the first Thor film from Loki's point of view.
Relationships: Laufey & Loki (Marvel), Loki & Odin (Marvel), Loki & Thor (Marvel)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 19





	Blood Like Ice

They say that blood knows blood, but I don’t think it does. You see, I grew up thinking I was the blood of Odin, King of Asgard. I had no idea that wasn’t the truth for more than a thousand years. I grew up in Asgard just like any other Asgardian – hating our enemies the frost giants. It was Odin himself who finally told me the truth of what I really was: I was one of THEM.

The enemy. The monster parents tell their children about at night.

He said he found me, abandoned as an infant, and, in the kindness of his heart, took me in and raised me as his own. In the face of such a tremendous lie already being revealed, you can imagine my further suspicion of this story. No, Odin had taken me for a reason. I was supposed to be the Prince of Peace, according to him. The plan was abandoned now, though, now that I had found out what he’d done.

They lied to me, all of them. My whole life. All I ever wanted was to be Thor’s equal, to be a worthy son in my father’s eyes and he never even was my father. I was never a son. I was a trophy. Another stolen relic, locked up in Asgard until he might have use of me. Just like the Casket he stole from Jotunheim when he conquered it around the time of my birth. On that day, the Allfather brought home to Asgard more than just a casket, he brought a baby: me.

I do not know what Odin’s original plan was to reveal this fact to me, nor will I ever find out, I think. I found out by accident on Jotunheim during Thor’s idiotic raid there. A frost giant touched me, but instead of it burning me, like it had Volstagg, my hand and arm turned blue. The same blue as the Jotun who held me. Upon my hand were raised lines in a pattern, which he read and recognized instantly. Instead of killing me, which he easily could have done in that moment, such was my shock, he released me and the color drained away from my hand.

I killed him.

I told no one what I’d seen and I damn sure didn’t let another Jotun touch me. When we returned to Asgard, I did the most logical thing I could think of to find out more. A story was forming in my head but I wanted so badly to be wrong. I went to the Armory to see the other relic taken from Jotunheim the same day as me: The Casket of Ancient Winters.

I could hear it singing to me, calling with the power of the Fimbulwinter of Ymir. I laid my hands upon it, was about to pick it up and behind me my father’s voice rang out.

“Stop!” He commanded me and I obeyed. I wasn’t about to mutely slink away, however. I needed to know. I could see my own hands were blue again from the touch of the Casket. I turned to face the man I was starting to believe was not my father after all.

“What am I?”

“You are my son,” he insisted and I knew he was lying. It was an evasion.

I demanded he tell me the truth, even though I did not want to hear it. No matter how painful, it is always better to know than to not know. I was Laufey’s son, a Prince of Jotunheim, not of Asgard. We argued, I yelled, and my anger drove my father into the Odinsleep.

I thought I’d killed him. I was terrified, heartbroken, alone.

It was during that Odinsleep that an idea occurred to me that would show my father that I chose him, that I was a true son of Odin and not some beast. I would reject my birth father in the most undeniable and final way possible: I would kill him. And I would do it in front of Odin.

I couldn’t lure Laufey to Asgard under anything but false pretenses. I went to Jotunheim. I revealed myself as the traitor in the house of Odin. I offered to smuggle Laufey and a couple of his men into Asgard so that he could kill Odin, claiming I wanted his throne but could not do the deed myself since I intended to take his place. In return for doing me that ‘favor’, I would return the Casket of Ancient Winters to Laufey to take back to Jotunheim. He leapt at the opportunity.

Of course, I had no plans of doing any such thing.

Once Laufey was in Asgard, I separated him from his guards and took him to the chamber in which my father slept. I watched, Gungnir in hand, as the hideous monster that was my true blood made to murder the father I loved. Before he could strike, I did.

Laufey, that idiot, had no idea I was his kin. He was completely unsuspecting. I don’t think he ever knew. I hit him squarely with a blast from Gungnir before his icy blade could descend to pierce Odin’s chest. The blow knocked the frost giant across the chambers but did not kill him. Whatever else they may be, the Jotnar are tough bastards.

I could have stopped then. Could have taken him prisoner, could have had him tried and executed properly for his attempt to assassinate the King of Asgard. Who would challenge me, a Prince of the Realm, as eyewitness? He would surely be doomed.

It wasn’t enough.

It is said that Odin can still see and hear what goes on around him while in the Odinsleep and while I had no confirmation of this, I wasn’t taking any chances. Laufey had decreed that Odin’s death came at his hand. The Jotun seemed surprised that I had betrayed him. Dense creatures.

“And your death came,” I told him before finishing him off where he lay wounded. “By the son of Odin.”

I felt nothing.

They say that blood knows blood, but at that moment all I knew was that I felt only hatred and disgust for mine. Perhaps there is ice in my blood after all, but Laufey was not my father. He was NEVER my father. I am a son of Odin and I will prove it by exterminating every last frost giant in the Nine. Then Odin will know I am a worthy son and my secret will be safe.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to destroy Jotunheim.

_For you, Father. For all of us._

**Author's Note:**

> Comments, corrections, concrit welcome. Thanks for reading!


End file.
